Close: “Sitting During the Billy Collins Q&A”
Often I catch myself asking
how not to answer questions you haven’t even asked
yet
“Yet” is the cruelest promise I make to myself
because first I pretend it doesn’t mean “maybe”
and then I hang a future from it
that’s like tying the sagging porch to the awning
So I envy the college boy up at the mic to pose Billy Collins a question
He quivers because he has studied so hard to know the answer
and doesn’t really hear about the tension between
freedom and form
Neither do I because sitting there
I am also sitting in the jazz bar
That night the light didn’t shine for me
but I recall being so grateful for the music
for how generous it could be
to touch me
when the glow you smuggled into that dark room
noted the clear path
and simply decided
not to alight
You know Billy
I really did lean on the music then
By now the college boy is there and gone
and I’m back and here
It could be my turn
I once took a chance
and asked Mary Oliver of silence
This time I take the chance
to not ask
Jordan Baylon 3/17/2012
